Makkala Jeevodaya (11-12-2011)

Christmas – the very mention of the word brings to mind images of Santa Claus and candy canes, Christmas trees and beautiful wreaths, cake and wine and loads to dine. But in all the merriment and enjoyment, do we ever stop to think of those less fortunate than we are? The true “Christmas spirit” that makes one more selfless, more friendly, more kind and generally, more nicer. This year, Living C.L.A.Y. looked at Christmas as an opportunity to spread the Christmas cheer and brighten the lives of 21 young girls in Makkala Jeevodhaya.

Preparations began early on, with shopping for sweaters, stationery, bangles, chocolates – things that would bring a smile on any little girl’s face; meeting up after work and on weekends to practice carols and action songs. The beautiful Sunday dawned clear and bright, we couldn’t have wished for a more amazing start. Carrying our gifts and beaming with joy, we entered the gates of “Makkala Jeevodaya”. This place is home to young girls who’ve been rescued from the red-light areas. The sisters who run the home aim to provide each girl with the ability to fend for herself and to lead a life of dignity.  They have a strong track record, having rehabilitated over 586 women and girl children, with 50 women now married and settled, 17 women professionally trained, well-prepared to face the future.

We had visited the place 2 years ago, but we did not expect the children there to remember us. So we were in for a pleasant surprise when they not just recognized us and also inquired about the members of the group who weren’t there for this visit. We sang carols and action songs, followed by introductions for the benefit of the new ones. Those who were initially shy and reclusive, soon warmed up to the other and in no time at all the whole group and kids seemed like a family having fun together, playing, shouting, singing, screaming and clapping. The girls enthusiastically showed us their dance performances that had won them accolades at school. With ear-to-ear grins and enthusiastic leaps, they pounced on each other’s balloons during the game of balloon bursting, and pop-pop-pop went the balloons.

But what’s Christmas without Santa, right? To the merry tune of Jingle Bells, Santa Ho-Ho-Hoed his way in, bearing balloons, gifts and chocolates for all the kids. The squeals of joy and delight were reward enough for us. A small cake cutting ceremony ensued and we all gathered in the dining rooms to gorge on delicious plum cake, chips and soft drinks. As we watched the little kids savour the cake and chips, we felt a glow, the spirit of Christmas slowly spreading its warmth through all of us.

Tired yet content as we looked at the gleaming eyes of the elated girls, we trudged our way back with a sense of accomplishment, the glow of Christmas now radiating through us.  

I recently went to my hometown and as my brother and I were window-shopping in the mall, we decided to grab a bite to eat. We barely entered the food court when my brother waved his hand in the air, acknowledging his friends sitting over in the corner. We moved a few steps ahead and his hand goes back in the air, this time to a different group of people. "Another set of friends", he tells me. He keeps waving at every alternate group of people and I begin to feel he's some kind of famous celebrity while I'm the umbrella-holding assistant of this star.

His network, he claims. But isn't networking something we all do? We network through various media, be it through the social forums of Facebook or the primitive Orkut, texting our friends through mobile phones, phone calls or Skype video chat - life is all about our networks and friends and family. Meeting up at the local coffee shops, or our college canteens, hanging out at the movies, malls or friends houses - various ways we choose to converse and enjoy with those close to ourselves. As I look back, I realize I have made a lot of friends on my journey to where I am today - classmates, colleagues, church friends, dance class friends, Toastmasters, the list is endless. And the World Wide Web is just one way of connecting them all together.

Google, with their new feature, Google+, helped make these social 'circles' a virtual one as well. You can create your own circles of 'Friends' and 'Family'. A different implementation of a common concept. Although many sites have offered the feature of creating groups, the visual imagery that Google offered was intriguing. Yes, it does have its drawbacks, but I do find the concept pretty fascinating. Though I haven't use it much, the new merger of Circles into Gmail makes for easy linking of various friend groups.

Looking forward to see what Google has to offer next....

The first article I ever wrote!

This was a write up for Pit Stop 2009, an event by the youth of my parish, where the aim was to just sit back, relax and enjoy. :) Hope you have fun reading it!

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A whole new world

A new fantastic point of view

No one to tell us no or where to go

Or say we're only dreaming

A whole new world
A dazzling place I never knew
But when I'm way up here
It's crystal clear
That now I'm in a whole new world with you
Now I'm in a whole new world with you

Unbelievable sights
Indescribable feeling

Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling…..

The words of this beautiful song kept going through my head throughout the day. The feeling of togetherness, calm and several other mixed emotions that we felt are truly “indescribable”.

We started in the morning with the Eucharistic celebration by Fr. Fidelis D' Lima OFM who despite his age is very modern in his thoughts. With the readings of the day focusing on how we need to prove our faith in action, Fr Fidelis explained to us how we need to constantly ask God for the strength to overcome difficult situations, to find our “true selves” by letting go of our egos. Aligning our priorities so that we will consciously participate in the life of Jesus is not necessarily the easiest thing to do, but it always brings us closer to our faith’s goal, our salvation.

After the mass, we celebrated “Bumper Birthdays”. As we all joined together in singing the birthday song, Sandeep had an extravagant vanilla facial done as the rest of us wiped off the cake together with some lovely biscuits and coffee provided by the brothers.

Stomachs temporarily filled, we sat down for a session by Fr. Fidelis, wondering what he would talk to us about now (the topic for the session was not known to us). We were surprised as he honestly admitted being initially stumped for a topic that he felt he could talk about to a bunch of people less than half his age (at least in the physical sense – at mind, he’s younger than most of us). He asked us to think of a single thing that would give us “greatest fulfillment and contentment in life”. As we all came up with our thoughts on what we felt would make us happy in life, he classified the same into 3 categories – Being, Doing and Having. He explained to us how what we “have” or what we “do” is mostly based on the circumstances around us; anyone who believed in living a problem free life was, as the author Scott Peck put it, living in a “fool’s paradise”. We only have control over “Being” who we are – we are responsible for our own actions and we need to continue doing our best irrespective of the circumstances. Our norm of living our lives should not depend on our circumstances. We need to do our best in every sphere of activity. This will ensure that we are not disappointed. While telling us all about this he came to the topic of the day “INTEGRITY”

Integrity means

1. Honouring your core word – Your “core word” is a promise that you may have made to yourself or to others.
2. Matching your word with actions towards others in keeping with your core word
3. Admitting fully to ourselves (and if need be, to others), your lapses in your core word – your inauthenticity.

After the food for thought that Father gave us, we now realized we needed some food for our stomachs – we were really hungry. With rumbling stomachs, we all went down to the Friary dining hall, where we were met with the sight of a really scrumptious looking chicken biryani. After the Grace before meals said by Fr. Tom, we ate with the brothers who seemed as excited to meet us as we were to get to know them. The biryani was every bit as delicious as it looked – some even debated joining the Friary for the food. We all chatted with the brothers, laughing our way through lunch and discussing our different cultures and lifestyles. I’m sure they enjoyed the change in their regular patterns with all the noise and liveliness we brought in. It was a welcome change for most of the brothers.

Post lunch, we all marched to the basketball court, geared up to win the matches to follow. As Br. Tomy came with enough lemons and Glucon-D to feed an army and Ravin turned up with a First Aid kit, we all got together and formed teams. Naming the teams “Creative”, “Loving”, “Active” and “Yielding” to go with our group name, we formed teams of 6 members each, mixing up the brothers and our group members. What ensued were matches between the teams “Creative” and “Loving”, and “Active” and “Yielding”. As two of the teams “Creatively Yielded”, the “Lovingly Active” teams made it to the finals. Those who weren’t playing cheered with all their might as the teams competed to win the match. After an exciting match, the “Loving” team won, and Br. Francis was unanimously declared “Man of the Match”. After the prize distribution, we all went in for tea which we had in the bowls used by the Friars for tea along with some delectable snacks – a truly unique experience of having tea from a bowl.

As the evening progressed towards an end, we all gathered together in the garden for photo sessions with the brothers. It seemed like we’d all been together for years. “A whole new world, a wondrous place” was now opened to us and the memories of this day will linger fresh in our minds for a long time to come.

Dance....like no one's watching!

Dance India Dance, Zara Nachke Dikha, So you think you can dance, Dancing with the stars... There are so many dance shows, and yet, each time someone says the word dance, my facial expressions change – I turn pale, freeze in my seat and blatantly refuse to go onto the floor.

‘Dance’ – a single word that brought a complete change in my behaviour.  I freely admit I was born with two left feet, a wooden doll with rigid movements and an awkward stance on the floor. At any function, I never went anywhere near the floor, since I’d inevitably be dragged onto it. “Stay away from the floor” was my motto for those 3 hours.  If, by some cruel twist of fate, I did land on the floor, I was usually distinguishable from miles away – the tall block of wood who was just moving, not really dancing.  The fact that there probably were thousands of eyes on me definitely didn’t help matters, increasing my nervousness tenfold and making my movements more woodenish.

I decided to do something about it, and signed up for dance lessons. I joined the class along with a few other friends of mine. The first class and they ask us to pair up. I look around the room, realizing with rising trepidation that I’m the tallest one around, not just among the girls but among the guys as well! I pair up with a friend of mine, who’s almost my height. Pretty soon we realize this isn’t working. He’s literally standing on his toes to even attempt to twirl me. And as for leading me on the dance floor... let’s just say my body follows its own commands. :D Quoting my friend “You lead yourself, forgetting that the GUY is supposed to lead you!”

So what do you do when you don’t just think, you know you can’t dance? You have two options - you either choose to refuse to dance ever, or you learn the bare minimum to make it appear like you’re dancing. J The first isn’t really an option, considering I have friends who drag me from the chair on to the floor (and I don’t mean the dance floor! I’ve been dragged and when I resisted, I was tugged until the chair slipped and before I knew it, I was on the floor!). But over time, I’ve realized I can shake a leg, when I know no one’s watching or if I don’t know anyone in particular in the audience. And the feeling is simply exhilarating. I’m still reluctant to get on the floor, but I don’t run away from it either today.

When asked recently to join a hip hop class with a few of my Toastmasters friends, my programmed instant reply was “No way! I can’t dance!” Yet as they convinced me to join, the fact that it was a special class just for us made me think “Why not? It’s a form of dance that although tough, doesn’t require me to have a partner, something I can learn and even if I never use it again, I’m sure I’ll enjoy myself”. Two months down the line, we’re now gearing up to perform at Reverberations 2011, at the end of this month. And as nervous as I am, I’m really excited about it as well!

Here’s hoping our performance is a rocking success! J

You know what I did last Sunday?

 “Hey you wanna go for the new movie Bodyguard?”

Listening to this question, my mind flutters back to several weeks ago, when I was flipping channels on the television.

As some of you may remember, the film was due for release close to Eid and Ganesh Chaturthi. And a program on TV has Ganesh Chaturthi celebrations in full swing. The wife goes up to her husband whining, “Manav, where is the surprise you promised? You said you have something special for me.” And the husband, pointing to the stage says, “Look, it’s right there now”. Wondering what on earth could be the surprise, I decide to watch. A group of guys are dancing away, and I hear the soon-to-be popular tune of Bodyguard.

Oh, Salman Khan is making a special entry in serials now to promote his movie

When I see Kareena Kapoor dance her way in! And the wife going “Oh wow, Kareena Kapoor! Manav, you are the best! I love you!”

Which woman would be so pleased to see a beautiful lady stealing her thunder and be glad about it? And people say women are a jealous bunch??? They haven’t watched this show. :P

Still thinking how stupid this is, I flip channels. Some other program. A pitch dark night.... A deserted highway.... An old lady seated in the back seat of her car, the chauffeur driving at what I’m pretty sure are speeds way above the speed limits. It’s late at night, and the old woman is urging the driver “Hurry, hurry”. Suddenly out of nowhere sprung a bunch of goons. The driver tries to avoid them, he swerves to the left, to the right, but is finally forced to bring the car to a halt. He is dragged out and beaten up by the goons. They now turn their attention towards the old lady, like pack of hungry wolves near a sheep. There’s sudden silence, fear in the old woman’s eyes... (PAUSE)

(Hum the Bodyguard tune) Piercing through the thick mist....riding in on a bike.... Our hero makes an entry. He gets off the bike and walks towards the car. “Bodyguard” is the last word I heard before I switched off the television and ran away to preserve my sanity.

“Pearl, Pearl, are you listening to me? Do you want to watch Bodyguard?”

I’m snapped back to the present. My friend is a huge fan of Salman Khan and when she asks me if I’d like to come for the movie, she means “I want to go for it, and I’d like you to keep me company.” I’m tempted to decline the “invite”, but knowing she’d be hurt, I agree to go.

D-Day arrives. The curtains roll, the movie begins. 10 minutes in, and I’m trying hard not to laugh. The introduction to our hero is an amazing dialogue which ends with “His one look can scare any man”, and the camera focuses on our hero... wearing sunglasses!

I look around at the rest of the audience, sitting at the edge of their seat, watching every scene in the movie with bated breath, as if their very existence depended on it.

I’m relieved when the intermission sign is shown, and was an eager volunteer to go buy popcorn. I almost sprint out of the movie hall to go stand in the queue. While I was awaiting my turn at the counter, I overhear 2 guys talking behind me...

Guy 1: It’s such an awesome movie man! I’ve watched it like 4 times already but I just can’t get enough!

I assume he’s referring to some other movie that’s going on, and wonder why I agreed to come with my friend, when I could have been watching that movie instead

Guy 2: I know dude! Miracles happen when Sallu bhai releases a film on Eid...

Wha-att! Wait a minute... Are these guys talking about the same movie I’m watching???

Guy 2: And his entry! That dance step involving alternately flexing his biceps, just fantabulous!

Guy 1: He’s such an amazing man. Such a larger than life personality, yet so down-to-earth.... Remember how self-deprecating he got when he sang “Sabse hot, sabse hard”...

I was still trying to figure out how that was supposed to be self deprecating.

Guy 1: And that final fight man! I’d watch that movie again and again just for that scene.... How he is blinded by mud and has to use his hearing. Betcha even Batman would be put to shame.

Oh yeah, I had to agree with that! I haven’t yet watched the final sequence, but if what I had watched so far was any indication, the hero was Rajnikant, Spiderman, Krish and Superman, Batman all rolled into one.

I’m now wondering if I even need to go back to the theatre.... But wait! Turns out he wasn’t done yet!!

Guy 1: And then his shirt coming off with that water cannon. So innovative! Uff. Too. Much. No English action movie can beat that!

My head is reeling by now, and I was just glad when my turn came at the counter.

I grab the popcorn and coke and flee from there. I make my way back to the theatre to have my friend hiss at me - “Why are you so late? You missed 10 minutes already”

“Did it really matter?”

The climax of the movie is a must watch, for no words I say here can ever do it justice...  But as I walked out of that theatre, I had a smile on my face. I had thoroughly enjoyed the movie. Albeit, I laughed for all the wrong reasons, and had lost three hours of my life that I’d never get back, but I had got my money’s worth on the movie, made a friend happy and had just got a wonderful story for my next post. :)

The Sacrifice

Back in the fifteenth century, in a tiny village near Nuremberg, lived a family with eighteen children. Eighteen! In order merely to keep food on the table for this mob, the father and head of the household, a goldsmith by profession, worked almost eighteen hours a day at his trade and any other paying chore he could find in the neighborhood. Despite their seemingly hopeless condition, two of Albrecht Durer the Elder’s children had a dream. They both wanted to pursue their talent for art, but they knew full well that their father would never be financially able to send either of them to Nuremberg to study at the Academy.

After many long discussions at night in their crowded bed, the two boys finally worked out a pact. They would toss a coin. The loser would go down into the nearby mines and, with his earnings, support his brother while he attended the academy. Then, when that brother who won the toss completed his studies, in four years, he would support the other brother at the academy, either with sales of his artwork or, if necessary, also by laboring in the mines.

They tossed a coin on a Sunday morning after church. Albrecht Durer won the toss and went off to Nuremberg. Albert went down into the dangerous mines and, for the next four years, financed his brother, whose work at the academy was almost an immediate sensation. Albrecht’s etchings, his woodcuts, and his oils were far better than those of most of his professors, and by the time he graduated, he was beginning to earn considerable fees for his commissioned works.

When the young artist returned to his village, the Durer family held a festive dinner on their lawn to celebrate Albrecht’s triumphant homecoming. After a long and memorable meal, punctuated with music and laughter, Albrecht rose from his honored position at the head of the table to drink a toast to his beloved brother for the years of sacrifice that had enabled Albrecht to fulfill his ambition. His closing words were, “And now, Albert, blessed brother of mine, now it is your turn. Now you can go to Nuremberg to pursue your dream, and I will take care of you.”

All heads turned in eager expectation to the far end of the table where Albert sat, tears streaming down his pale face, shaking his lowered head from side to side while he sobbed and repeated, over and over, “No …no …no …no.”

Finally, Albert rose and wiped the tears from his cheeks. He glanced down the long table at the faces he loved, and then, holding his hands close to his right cheek, he said softly, “No, brother. I cannot go to Nuremberg. It is too late for me. Look … look what four years in the mines have done to my hands! The bones in every finger have been smashed at least once, and lately I have been suffering from arthritis so badly in my right hand that I cannot even hold a glass to return your toast, much less make delicate lines on parchment or canvas with a pen or a brush. No, brother … for me it is too late.”

More than 450 years have passed. By now, Albrecht Durer’s hundreds of masterful portraits, pen and silver-point sketches, watercolors, charcoals, woodcuts, and copper engravings hang in every great museum in the world, but the odds are great that you, like most people, are familiar with only one of Albrecht Durer’s works. More than merely being familiar with it, you very well may have a reproduction hanging in your home or office.

One day, to pay homage to Albert for all that he had sacrificed, Albrecht Durer painstakingly drew his brother’s abused hands with palms together and thin fingers stretched skyward. He called his powerful drawing simply “Hands,” but the entire world almost immediately opened their hearts to his great masterpiece and renamed his tribute of love “The Praying Hands."

The next time you see a copy of that touching creation, take a second look. Let it be your reminder, if you still need one, that no one – no one – - ever makes it alone!

Remember to sincerely thank those who have helped you to get where you are!

William Ward, an English missionary, once said “Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it!”

So often we go through your life without thanking the people that have touched our lives and made a difference. Stop and think for a minute… Who has touched your life in some way that you may not have acknowledged? It could be someone who was in your life for a day, a week, a year… or maybe they are still in your life.  You’ll know when you have that special someone in your mind.  You will feel a rush of JOY come over you.

Now that you have that person… take action!  Give them a call, send them an email, write them a letter...  This will surely make their day!!! It can make all the difference in the world to that person knowing that they made your life better by being a part of it.

As Mother Theresa rightly said, “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless!”

Serial Thriller

So no one told you life was gonna be this way

Your job’s a joke, you’re broke, your love life’s DOA.

It’s like you’re always stuck in second gear,

When it hasn’t been your day, your week, your month, or even your year.

But, I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour

I'll be there for you, like I’ve been there before

I'll be there for you, coz you’re there for me too.

How many of us have grown up listening to this track as we eagerly awaited the next episode of Friends, waiting to see what Rachael Chandler Monica Ross Joey or Phoebe would do next?

I, for one, had never watched this television sitcom. It wasn’t that I didn’t watch TV. On the contrary, I was hooked on to watching television – cartoons, movies, music; I watched them all. But when it came to serials, I had ADD. I couldn’t watch them for more than a couple of episodes. Having to wait for a week before I knew what happens next would drive me nuts. And sometimes the storyline itself was absurd! They all started out fine, a nice story which captivated your interest and then it went on and on and on like chewing on a piece of old gum. I watched my mom watch a serial in which the male lead had gotten married 5 times to 5 different women and the female lead was also married 5 times, but those marriages happened between just 2 men! How could anyone subject themselves to such torture of watching such nonsense? It was just beyond me.

Then I moved into college. A daily journey of over an hour gave lots of scope for conversation. I learnt why Tulsi was always so upset (we attributed it to the fact that Baa wouldn’t die despite having 5 generations after her). I learnt about Buffy and Angel, Heroes and Prison Break. Encouraged by my friends, I finally decided there was a show that I wanted to watch. But since my mom had a serial she watched regularly at the same time slot, I was vetoed. Having to watch bits and pieces of an episode drove me nuts and I discontinued watching the series.

When I was moving to Bangalore, I was finally glad to be able to say bye to the serials my mom watched. “Good riddance to bad rubbish”, I said to myself. The first day I moved into my PG, I realized that while my mom watched two serials, this lady watched twenty! I had a sudden newfound respect for my mother. :O The TV in my PG stayed on from about 6:30 in the evening till 11:30 at night. And at prime times, she watched 2 or 3 serials simultaneously; smartly switching channels during advertisements and other boring dialogues.

Over time, I got used to the routine of the serials and didn’t give it much thought until I went for my cousin’s wedding in Mumbai and realized I was talking to my aunt about the serials that came on television and we were actually discussing the characters. Having nothing much else to do, I had ended up watching the very same serials I despised! Perturbed, I returned from that trip and decided to forget all about it. When I finally thought I’d conquered it all, it returned from beyond the grave to haunt me again.

One evening as I went with my team for snacks, I was talking to my friend about how my PG owner watched an innumerable amount of serials and how her ability to multitask was absolutely amazing; when my manager talks about this amazing serial Uttaran that his wife and he were watching. Assuming he just watched it because his wife did, I just replied saying “Yeah, aunty watches that serial too”. And then he drops the bomb “Did you watch yesterday’s episode? We had to miss it. What happened yesterday?” I was stunned. My boss wasn’t just watching the serial because his wife was, rather it seemed his wife was watching it because of him! And now, here I was bonding with my boss over serials?? Eww…

After I’d gotten over the shock of my boss’ addiction to serials, and being mercilessly teased by my friends about how I’d “bonded with the boss”, I finally justified it to myself saying not all serials are bad. There are quite a few that I have watched and loved myself, so maybe others find other serials interesting.

Having made peace with myself, I moved on. One morning when I was talking to my roommate, she said “You’re probably getting late for work” and I responded “No, Sasural Simmar ka is still going on. I still have time” (PAUSE) I realized how absurd I’d just sounded. Staying in the same place for so long had me mapping my whole daily routine to the timings of these serials! When a serial’s time slot was shifted, my whole time balance was thrown off key!

I decided I had to do something about this. “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”. So I decided I would be the one to choose which serials I watched. I downloaded some of my old favourites from the net and started a serial marathon. Being able to watch them at my own time and pace gave me a sense of satisfaction. I probably still can’t subject myself to the torture of watching some of the daily soaps that come on TV, but I know I’ve made my peace with the ghost of serials.

My plans for the evening? To go home, sit with a bag of chips and go through the 10 seasons of Friends and enjoy what I’ve probably been missing out on.